Wayhaaa! I've won on the lottery!!!!!!

OK - dont get too excited! It was only 5 numbers and as it was in the office syndicate I have to share it with 11 other girls. But its still given me £200 ($400)I didn't have this morning. So as you can imagine we have all spent the day planning how we are going to spend our ill gotten gains. Hubby has already told me I have to pay for the drinks when we go to the Red Lion tomorrow night. Well that's not going to break the bank! Anyway after some discussion with hubby tonight I have decided to splash out on the garden (I can hear you all going Whaaat! how boring is that!!!!)I admit it kind of spoils the rock chick image, but actually I'll get more pleasure from that than any amount of new clothes. I'm strictly a jeans and t-shirt type of girl anyway.

The problem is we stripped the garden last year pretty much (it's 60 years old and needed a revamp). The plan is to put in a new pond (we have actually dug it out, but the weather last year was so atrocious that's as far as we got). I have great plans for a waterfall and fountain with goldfish & lilies and flowerbeds with lots of roses, clematis, wisteria etc. I just want a riot of colour basically!. This will be the second garden that we have transformed (If anyone wants to see the first go here). So I can't wait for the spring and all that lovely shopping at the Garden Centre!

Sharing my sense of humour with you

I seem to be posting a lot of humorous stuff lately and not a lot of personal stuff. This is only because I am getting a lot of good stuff in my email and like to share it with you, my good friends. (Also I dont have a lot of time at the moment as I am working more on my new blog

Family History for Beginners

- feel free to drop in:-)I appreciate that not everyone is going to share my sense of humour, but I hope that you enjoy it. I only post what makes me laugh personally. It's all fairly harmless stuff, with only the odd joke that may not be in the best possible taste. I will continue to post anything I think will raise a smile among my readers and hope you continue to enjoy them.

My New Blog on Family History

I have just started a new blog on family history called Family History for Beginners which I am very excited about. Genealogy and family history is my main interest and I have been doing it for about 10 years. This site is my attempt at providing the information I would have liked to find when I first started. I have tried to make it as easy to understand as possible and will be adding regularly to it with a lot more information. Please check it out and and let me know what you think.

One way to get a job! (probably not recommended!)

SENIOR CITIZEN JOB APPLICATION - B & Q

This is allegedly an actual job application that a 75-year-old pensioner submitted to B&Q in Tunbridge Wells.

They hired him because he was so funny.....

NAME: Kenneth Way (Grumpy Bastard)

SEX: Not lately, but I am looking for the right woman (or at least one who will cooperate)

DESIRED POSITION: Company's Chief Executive or Managing Director. But seriously, whatever's available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be applying in the first place - would I?

DESIRED SALARY: £150,,000 a year plus share options and a Tony Blair style redundancy package. If that's not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.

EDUCATION: Yes.

LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.

PREVIOUS SALARY: A lot less than I'm worth.

MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and post-it notes.

REASON FOR LEAVING: It was a crap job.

HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK: Any.

PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30-3:30 p.m. Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.

DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Yes, but they're better suited to a more intimate environment.

MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be here?

DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING UP TO 50 lbs.?: Of what?

DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the more appropriate question here would be "Do you have a car that runs?"

HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?: I may already be a winner of the Reader's Digest Timeshare Free Holiday Offer, so they tell me.

DO YOU SMOKE?: On the job - no! On my breaks - yes!

WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?: Living in the Bahamas with a
fabulously wealthy Swedish supermodel with big tits and who thinks I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually, I'd like to be doing that now.

NEAREST RELATIVE....7 miles

DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR
KNOWLEDGE?: Oh yes, absolutely.

***Old People Rock!***

Not going grey gracefully!

Today I made the decision to not go grey gracefully! I have been fighting this decision for quite a while, in fact ever since the last time I had my hair cut (over a year now). It has now reached that length (just below shoulder length)when it gets unmanageable and just looks strealy. When I was younger I coloured my own hair for years, but now I have gone past the 50 mark the impetus has been lost somewhere.

Actually I have been fascinated watching my hair change over the last couple of years and acquire a pewter hue. But actually its more a sparkly silver in the sun, especially when its just been washed and is cut short! Both my mother and grandmother were white by the age of 60 so it's in the genes. I have told my daughter this and she is horrified, unfortunately I only see her a couple of times a year and each time she is fascinated to see how much more silver I have aquired.

So I have taken the plunge and booked an appointment at the hairdresser for a cut and blow dry on Saturday. This means I am going to have to get on with the colouring before Saturday. Saturday being the day of the Company Christmas Dinner and Dance - hence the last minute panic stations - I have just realised I cannot go looking like the mad woman of Chaillot! Fortunately the first hairdresser I tried had a slot which saved a lot of time, but Saturday is going to be busy, what with having my hair done and then having to go shopping for something to wear, as I have also now realised that it simply will not be good enough to throw on the first thing I find in the wardrobe (and I simply do not have anything dressy enough to wear -aaaargh!)I live in jeans and t-shirts when not at work and resent paying good money for something I'm probably only going to wear once or twice - I have better things to spend my money on!

An English Love Poem!

Thought I'd share this with my readers (assuming I have any!)

Of course I love ya darling
You're a bloody top Notch bird
And when I say you're gorgeous
I mean every single word

So ya bum is on the big side
I don't mind a bit of flab
It means that when I'm ready
There's somethin' there to grab

So your belly isn't flat no more
I tell ya, I don't care
So long as when I cuddle ya
I can get my arms round there

No woman who is your age
Has nice round perky breasts
They just gave in to gravity
But I know ya did ya best

I'm tellin ya the truth now
I never tell ya lies
I think its very sexy
That you've got dimples on ya thighs

I swear on me grannies grave now
The moment that we met
I thought you was as good as
I was ever gonna get

No matter wot you look like
I'll always love ya dear
Now shut up while the telly's on

And fetch another beer.

Sickness and Celebrity!

Well last week was pretty much a complete write off. I had booked wednesday afternoon off as holiday as well as Thursday & Friday and the plan was my daughter came up on Thursday with my grandson to stay the weekend, going home on Monday. That was the plan anyway - on Tuesday morning I woke up feeling fine. 5 minutes later I wasn't feeling fine at all! I spent the next couple of days in the bathroom - need I say more? Tues & Wed were pretty ghastly and Thurs & Fri weren't much better, though by Friday afternoon at least I was able to get to the doctors for a certificate, which will enable me to rebook my holiday dates.

Pepsi and Max were as good as gold while I was incapacitated, it was as though they both new something wasn't right with me. Pepsi had seen me throwing up the first time, watched me with some interest and then retreated into the dining room and stayed there!

Sam came up with Kieran on Thursday as planned but I wasn't fit to do much with them until Friday evening. She has a new boyfriend and spent most of the time on the mobile, either talking or texting, which was a little frustrating as she would disappear out to the car for ages at a time! Apparently he is 41, which I think is a bit on the old side considering she is only 24! Ho hum! We shall see where it goes - if anywhere!

We have been having fun watching I'm a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here! for the last couple of weeks and have enjoyed the antics of the OAP's (Old Aggressive People) as they have been dubbed. We watched John Burton Races's 2 TV series when they were on and had dinner at his restaurant, the New Angel in Dartmouth, Devon as a special treat for my birthday a couple of years ago. It was very nice but very expensive!

I have also seen Janice Dickinson on America's Top Model and have been fascinated with her antics, she seems to veer from one extreme to the other, but seems rather lost now that all the other OAP's have left. The young ones seem determined to freeze her out. I have a feeling she may be next to go.

As for the big story - the Marc Bannerman/Cerys Matthews 'romance', I can't wait to see how that develops once she is out. He seems to have been getting some very bad press since he came out and is not what he seems at all. For one thing it turns out he is Irish, born in Dublin and apparently told the Eastenders producers he was Italian when he went for the part of Gianni. His now ex girlfriend has been telling the papers he beat her up and she had to put her arm through a glass window to stop him (seems a bit drastic to me!)and of course the requisite barmaid has put in an appearance & sold her story as well! Cerys comes across as very sweet and seems to have really fallen for him so I hope it doesn't turn into a disaster for her. I shall watch developments with interest!